So often we feel powerless in life. We give in to our circumstances and become a spectator of our own story. Even a victim at times. We watch life unfolding with its bad and good moments but it doesn't feel like we are creating anything – moment after moment we have the impression there is nothing left to choose and it's now up to luck and chance.
Maybe you hear similar phrases in your head: If only my husband/wife would help more around the house or with finances, life would be easier and I would be happier. If I had chosen a different profession, I would be earning more and living elsewhere. If I wasn't a single parent I would have more time and a happier life. If I had a different body, a different background, a different childhood, and so on.
You get the idea. We find the perfect explanation why our life isn't the way we would like it to be and then we settle, get cozy in our half met goals and desires and hope things will get better one day. Except that it doesn't. Hope is a beautiful word, it nearly sounds like faith and trust but frankly, excuse the daring here, it is somewhat threatening to a person's future and ability to take action. Exactly because it is so comforting, like things will change because the Universe is good and all I have to do is sit and wait, sit and hope!
Now you may disagree with me and that is okay. Hope has a special place on the list of positive words and perhaps you are right. But try and understand what I mean for a second: What changes someone's life are, and always will be, the actions they take (and yes, combined with their intention, vision, prayers – or hope if you will.)
What a person does is always what will determine their success the most. We can wish for all that we want but may we have the discernment to take the necessary actions like life depends on it – because it does!
Let me tell you. The world is full of helpful partners, ideal professions, great salaries, good places to live and married parents, and still people are living life on auto-pilot, day after day doing the same things and feeling like there is not much else to life apart from work, responsibilities and a bit of suffering.
It feels normal and ok because a lot of us are living like that. On the other hand though, there are a lot of us living life on our own terms, finding time and freedom to be the person we have always imagined ourselves being. People who realise their own power, tend to live more fulfilling lives.
And to be clear: This has nothing to do with being physically strong (the superwoman photo, I know!) or being a millionaire - far from it actually. This is about what you want. Being in touch with who you are and knowing enough about yourself to take steps towards where you want to go and not away from it. This is about finding what makes you move, what inspires you. And if what you want for yourself is to be a body builder or make a lot of money, then heck yes go after it 100%.
So here are my simple yet effective pieces of advice for a life with a bit more power:
Drop your roles for a moment and get real with yourself.
We play a lot of roles in our lives. I for example am a wife, mother, business mentor, daughter, friend. And sometimes we are so consumed by the parts we have to play that we can't seem to get in touch with the person behind it.
So just for a moment, sit quietly with yourself and ask: What is most important to me? What is the life I have always imagined having? Before everything became so “busy”, what were my interests, my desires, my dreams?
After you remember those forgotten things about yourself, be truthful:
What are your main excuses? What are the things stopping you?
Time, money and what happened in the past. Drop the excuses!
Maybe your personal reasons feel very real to you right now. It may even feel like a punch in the stomach what I am about to say but limitation only exists in our minds, nowhere else.
Sure you may have a lot of responsibilities and finances may be tight but have you ever heard of people who turned their situation around, who started prioritising what's important and who created success from rock bottom?
I'm sure you have. They are living proof that nothing is permanent, we can completely recreate ourselves and change our reality. It is a decision we make.
Even when we live the present consequences of our past choices and experiences. Even then we can start thinking new thoughts and move through transformation regardless of what happened to us. Time and money are manageable things and so is your level of commitment with yourself.
Get excited because there is only learning and discovery along the journey.
Start believing it is possible to regain your power. You have options and there is always at least one solution to every problem. You have time, it is just a matter of deciding what is priority to you. You have money. It may not be a lot right now but I am sure you can think of ways to utilise it more consciously. You are resourceful and creative. It is just a matter of owning it. We are all made powerful and capable, no matter how physically so we may be. Our power and ability are inside. It is more related to our attitude towards life.
Do you want to change profession, start a business, be healthier, get fit. What are the things that you love? Go after them.
Once you move from being a victim and spectator to being the creator and conscious decision maker you will see that life unfolds itself in much more meaningful ways. With its good and bad moments, yes. But with you powerfully deciding your next moves.